Helping You Understand Yourself Better
The lessons in the KNOWING ME module seek to empower you with the ability to self-reflect upon “what it means to be you.”
Each video lesson and its activities are designed so that you can better understand yourself and work to become the individual you want to be. It is important that you take each lesson’s activities to heart by being honest with your answers. You are not being graded so the only person you would be cheating is yourself. This is an opportunity to find practical ways to improve yourself and fulfill your potential.
The video lessons come with a number of activities or public and private discussion questions. Think critically about how you feel and the thoughts they inspire. By engaging in honest and open discussion in your classroom or with your mentor, you are not only helping yourself but helping those around you.
We invite you to preview the KNOWING ME module with unrestricted access to video #8, “Win The Biggest Game,” shown below. For FREE unrestricted access to all of our videos, please register with our site.
1- Who Do You THINK You Are?
Learning Objective: You will better understand various options for defining yourself in our culture and the consequences of each.
How do you define yourself? Who do you think you are? Where does your value come from? Is it a good idea to define yourself by what you have, or what you do, or the opinion of others? And if not, how would YOU prefer to answer this important question? “I am valuable because…”
How do you define yourself? Who do you think you are? Where does your value come from? Is it a good idea to define yourself by what you have, or what you do, or the opinion of others? This lesson will guide you in exploring how you define your own self worth. What you value about yourself and others now will influence the type of person you will eventually become.
After watching the video use the lesson worksheet below to answer the discussion questions.
Public- What is the most important new insight or conclusion you got from today’s video and discussion?
Private- If you don’t define yourself by what you have, or by what you do, or by the opinions of others, you could say “I am valuable because ….”
2- Imagine the Ideal You
Learning Objective: You will identify your most desirable behaviors and attitudes.
Have you ever imagined the ideal vacation, or the ideal summer day? Perhaps you’ve imagined an ideal performance in your sport, or the perfect part-time job. They say one of the most significant differences between humans and all the animals of the kingdom is our ability to imagine – to see in the theater of our mind what could be, not just what is.
For this lesson you will use the magic bead principle to identify your most desirable behaviors and attitudes. After viewing the video complete the magic bead activity as described in the worksheet below followed by completing the lesson’s discussion questions.
What benefits will we experience going forward by imagining our ideal self now?
Describe the “ideal you” in the following situations:
- When you have to learn something new
- When your work is criticized
- When a friend is in need of help
- When you get bad news about a grade
- When you are in your best mood
3- Another Kind of Smart
Learning Objective: You will create a personal plan for improving your personal Emotional Quotient (EQ).
If IQ stands for Intelligence Quotient, what does EQ stand for? The answer? – Emotional Quotient. Your EQ refers to how smart you are with your emotions and how well you understand the emotions of others. It turns out that high EQ is a better predictor of success than IQ.
This lesson will help you create a personal plan for improving your personal emotional quotient (EQ). By improving your EQ, you will work to close the gap between your current self and your IDEAL self by managing your emotions. After watching the video, click on the Worksheet link below to download the lesson activities
The worksheet (link below) will provide you with tips and activities for enhancing your EQ.
- Think of a recent situation in which you became angry. What did you do when you became angry? Now think about what happened because you became angry?
- If you were acting closer to your ideal self, how would you have responded? What benefits would that have gotten you?
4- Two Faces of Character
Learning Objective: You will learn to prioritize your most desired character traits and chart a course for improvement.
We don’t have to look very far to find examples of good or poor character traits. We see it in sports, business, and in school. Examples of good character show up in our heroes, and sometimes poor character still ends up holding a trophy at the end of a game. It can be confusing.
Character has two faces. Some character strengths face inward toward self, and some character strengths face outward toward others. The video lesson offers a list of both types. You will explore which type of characteristics you possess. How many of these characteristics are about you or your relationship with others? The video and worksheet will provide you with strategies on how to bolster your character.
- What three character traits do you think are the most urgent to improve?
- Which strategies from the worksheet do you think are the best methods for you to grow your character and why?
5- Find Your Swagger
Learning Objective: You will learn the nature of self-confidence and its source and explore the difference between legitimate swagger and phony arrogance.
Have you noticed that some kids seem to have it all together? They look and sound so sure of themselves while you feel like a pair of flip-flops in a world full of Nikes. Well, there’s actually a formula for swagger.
High self-esteem + High self-confidence = Major Swagger.
This lesson will explore the difference between legitimate Swagger and phony arrogance. Swagger is not about arrogance, but the real genuine kind of poise that’s cool without trying to be cool. It’s a combination of strong self-esteem, accepting your strengths and weaknesses, and believing in the skills you have.
- Which of your skills can you count on when needed? Describe your confidence.
- What do you imagine true Swagger would feel like for you?
6- What Do You Expect?
Learning Objective: You will learn the power of expectations and how to identify personal tendencies.
You sit down to take a test in school. What do you expect the next ten minutes to be like; Satisfying or Crash & Burn? You meet a friend to talk about a disagreement you had with each other over lunch. What do you expect from the conversation; Resolution or more hostility?
Some people are in the habit of expecting good things and some people always expect the worse. Which one are you?
This lesson will help you understand the power of expectations and learn how to identify your personal tendencies. It will explain how what you expect from a give expectation has a lot to do with what happens next.
The worksheet asks that you keep a record of your frequent thoughts (listening to your inner voice) at School, with Friends and at Home; then decide which thoughts are helpful.
- Positive Thoughts: Any thought that encourages me or takes me closer to being my ideal self.
- Negative Thoughts: Any thought that discourages me or takes me farther from being my ideal self.
7- Choose Optimism
Learning Objective: You will identify optimistic and pessimistic responses and learn how to benefit from optimistic choices.
So which one are you; A pessimist or an optimist? Or are you one of those people who think it doesn’t really matter?
The worksheet asks that you record your optimistic and pessimistic thoughts about mistakes you have made in the past.
- What are some of your pessimistic explanations and what are some of your optimistic explanations when you make a mistake? What do these explanation sound like?
- Choose an area of your life in which you are often pessimistic; What does your pessimistic self usually say about this topic and what does your optimistic self usually say?
8- Win the Biggest Game
Learning Objective: You will learn the role of one’s core values and articulate their application in your life.
You only get one shot at this BIGGEST game. The Biggest game is the game of LIFE, and here’s the deal: It lasts longer, is more important, and has more opponents than a normal competition.
This lesson will help you identify your core values. These core values are what will help you at winning the game of life. They are the guiding principles used to make life’s decisions.
- On the list of values provided on page two of the worksheet, identify your top five values then rank them.
- What does the phrase “losing at life mean to you? What does that look like?
- In what way could you do a better job of being true to your top two core values?
These lessons are followed by a 10-15 minute discussion which can be led by a teacher or mentor. The lessons are designed for middle and high school students and are all found on this web site.
9- Avoiding Self-Deception
Learning Objective: You will better understand personal denial and identify examples from your life.
Deception is common, but self-deception is seldom recognized. Have you ever been upset with a situation involving a friend, and then discover YOU caused the problem without realizing it? Everyone likes to be “Right” rather than “Wrong”. The problem is that we place such a premium on being “right” that we lose the humility to consider the possibility of being “wrong!”.
This video lesson explains how deception is common, but self-deception is seldom recognized. Have you ever been upset with a situation involving a friend, and then discover YOU caused the problem without realizing it? Everyone likes to be “Right” rather than “Wrong”. The problem is that we place such a premium on being “right” that we lose the humility to consider the possibility of being “wrong!”
The discussion questions in the lesson worksheet (below) are designed to help us think of situations in which we played a part in a misunderstanding or conflict, and to honestly admit our role in whatever happened.
- Private- In what way did I offend someone, add confusion, or mis- communicate in a recent situation?
- Public- What benefits will I experience by answering questions like this for myself?
How to use santorofoundation.org
This website is a free resource of material to help improve your social and emotional intelligence. The material on this website ranges from individual “sayings” to a full curriculum program called Alive2Thrive. To help you become your best self, please review all this site has to offer. It is important you pass this site along to others so they can be the best they can be and by doing so we will build the best society.